Journal 4 steps

 Dangerous behaviors while drunk

I guess my first-time drinking was during the summer of 84 in Florida at some Orlando apartment complex pool while my dad was hosting an AA pool party. Oh the irony. Maybe it was the summer before high school because I don't recall Andrew being there. Yes, it was 1985. That is when Dad got sober and it stuck. Gosh that was dangerous. Drinking with these older boys in a swimsuit with no help around. Nothing happened...at least I don't think so. The younger brother sent me a letter a year or so later saying that he had found a picture of me and my address. I recall there was an IV type bottle with M*A*S*H written on it. One would lie down on a lounger and open up for the IV to pour that dark, burning liquid directly into your esophagus scorching a path all the way down to your stomach where it added fuel to the fire. It hit quick. I vaguely remember swimming while drunk, then I was home puking, then a shower, then crying and looking in the mirror mesmerized by how crying makes my eyes so green. Dad was sad. It hit him pretty hard and possibly made him more determined to stay sober once and for all. I think when he came to Michigan to visit us for Christmas 1984, he was still drinking and was clearly drunk when he went sledding with us at Ford Lake Park. In the pictures I can see the Jack Daniels in his eyes. That had to have been my 7th grade year and by the next summer Dad was into AA and working the program. 

When Dad lived in that apartment complex, I also remember mixing up screw drivers intermittently although I still favored OJ and Sprite. Dad always had a gallon of Jack and a gallon of Vodka. Those were morning and night drinks with beer throughout the day. I never really knew him I guess until he got sober and I got older. We always had great conversatios

During 8th grade, Bebe came out to the garage while we were having a little party. She was hammered and really funny. There were times we would sneak a drink but not much. At Brenda's party in the spring there were a few beers consumed but again I don't think it was too much. 

Back in those years, Dave was adamant about keeping alcohol out of the house. At least I couldn't sneak it at home. Usually the drinking happened at parties, especially during swim season. 9th grade I went to a few swim parties and drank. Other than parties, alcohol did not play a big role in my life. 

In highschool my dangerous behaviors included driving, fighting, and having sex under the influence. Alcohol was the answer to every problem. Sad? Drink. Mad? drink. Happy? drink. ad nauseum. However it was not a must have on every night. When I dated Tim there was no alcohol. He did not evv

What problems have you tried to fix with drugs/alcohol?