I made it through what is usually the second most difficult time of the year. The buildup in ski season, the long cold weeks with lots of snow and minimal sun, and feel anxious about racing. This year was better. I still drank too much and watched too many shows, especially on the weekend. BUT working out at the gym and taking a course kept me focused on other things, as well.
Jan 1-4 wrapping up vacation and started my masters course.
Jan 5-11 the terrible bill and scrambling to figure out what to do. We figured it out and Tucker began FAST and signed up for FSC
Jan 12-18 Plugging away, lots of races and Crossfit staying in the game
Jan 19
Anyway...we kept plugging away. Problems keep arising and I am trying to focus on solutions and not over reacting.
Yesterday was the last FAST race in the regular season. The FA boys and girls both won conference champs. Tucker's ski fell off in the 1st run of GS, he went into the lodge took off all his gear and said this sport sucks, I am done. Then he made it back for run 2 and beat everyone. SL was his. 1st place. It always feels good. It is good to see this progress. That is really why he is there.
I want to run to the sun. I need warmth if not emotional then the sun will do. I want to leave, I want the wind in my hair, the radio blaring, and a destination ahead. Should I set out for NC? Damn it is a high of 50' there. How about a day trip to the beach? Where is the nearest beach? I have no idea but it is 3:15 and I am exhausted. Maybe my sleep potion is not working.
For weeks, since Tucker had the tough Christmas sessions with MWV, I have been on edge
I am glad that I kept this blog post up and did not post. I have real time anxiety thoughts and feelings. Yesterday, I actually did a bit of research to find out what exactly is going on with Tucker. The book explained that there is nothing wrong with Tucker. He just processes the world differently. It is a biosocial look at who he is. When he has big, intense emotions about something seemingly meainingless to me, I need to understand that it is not meaningless to him. I need to validate his feelings.
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